How to get a date without approaching. As well as Tinder and OKCupid. This is a long post! Click here to get it to your email to read later! The OP on reddit says: Never had a girlfriend.
Went away for school. Social awkwardness and social anxiety is a problem for him. He wants to go on dates but relies on Tinder and OkCupid to interact with single women. And what it is, is a giant list of limiting beliefs. First of before I even address this, I have this one limiting belief exercise that I like to practice that will shatter all limiting beliefs.
I hit the dating pool when I was I dated a girl from high school so I never really had to date. I just kind of had like this thing to fall into my lap and it lasted forever. Focus your efforts on that. When you figure out how to get a first date, the next step is to figure out how to get a second date. All these things come far, far before how to get a girlfriend. Everybody goes there to have sex, like a big giant orgy, non-stop.
People will hook up. A lot of singles mingle in college. Do not worry about that. Actually, the easiest time to get laid is tomorrow. Because every single day you should be getting better. That is, getting better with women in general. Not just getting laid. You should be improving upon this skill set.
You should be stepping up every single day and getting a little bit better. Keep pushing your boundaries. You should be going on first dates and then the next day or the next week you should be experiencing second dates.
And then the week beyond that you should be experiencing third dates. I mean I gotta start somewhere. I gotta make five bucks first, right? You say there is nowhere else you can meet attractive women… Go to Target!
Dude, like go to Whole Foods! Attractive women are everywhere, bro. You just got to open your eyes. Just go to a coffee shop and go there regularly.
As often as possible. Bring whatever you can to work on, or read. Whatever you do in your downtime. Bring it to the coffee shop find you a spot and post up. Go where you can be in the middle of stuff. Tons of attractive girls hang out in coffee shops. Go where your market is. Just chill in your spot, mark your territory. Get all your stuff spread out and be the man.
And then talk to the person nearest you. Then ask them what they are working on. It could be a girl, could be a hot chick, could be a fat chick. Do this every day, okay? That conversation just flows from you. Dating is a numbers game. The girl of your dreams! No, no, it comes from a million little efforts and building that confidence.
It will breed confidence because you know where that conversation is going. Sit in a coffee shop. How to Ask a Girl Out Let me go ahead take it a step further.
I want to tell you how to ask a girl out. When you talk to a good-looking girl just talk to her like you would anybody else. Forget her looks, forget what she looks like or any of that, just be asking about her.
Be listening a lot more than talking. Have you been kayaking? Have you been to the waterpark with the rapids? Would you like to hang out sometime? When are you free on Thursday?
You need to know two things when asking a girl out: Are you free at seven? Is Tinder a Waste of Time? I do really want to go on dates but I rely on Tinder and OkCupid to even interact with single girls. OkCupid is a lead source. Those women are all women. You just found them at different locations.
Different sources of defined leads. Same thing with online dating. Tinder, OkCupid, Target, Coffee shop, you just gotta take the good with the bad.
So all my life I struggled with the fact that I was five-seven and I started balding at age sixteen. That always bugged me. All the tall guys with great hair lines will always get the girls and I was never good enough. Not to mention I grew up in a trailer. Yeah I was dirt poor my whole life. That pretty much sealed the deal. I mean you went off and went to school and get five years of undergrad so you might have came from money maybe.
What I mean is that I could easily have found a way to make you better than me in my head because I was insecure about my height, and my hair, and my wallet. You can join a gym. Because what really matters to women is different than what matters to men.
Men are totally triggered visually. Whether women know it or not, above all else they want three things: Confidence Congruence Confidence Okay you need to work on at least confidence.
You need to be confident that physical attractiveness is subjective. Man chicks eat that up. So get more confident in who you are, in your game, and just know who you are.
My favorite book on attracting women with honest confidence — Models by Mark Manson Directness The second thing you need is directness. The directness aspect is in regards to stating your intentions. So if you are talking to a girl at the coffee shop and you like her so you ask her out. Are you free on Thursday? The indirect ask out is you facebook her later or something really weird like that.
Are you going to ask her out? Do you like her? So remember, be confident and direct.