Dating and god s will. How can I tell the difference between God's will and my desire?.



Dating and god s will

Dating and god s will

How can I tell the difference between God's will and my desire? Feb 07, Scott Croft Question A few months back, I happened to meet this girl who came to my church. She started coming to church because she has a broken family, and she wanted God to intervene in her life and help her.

After a few months of coming to church, she surrendered her life to Christ and accepted Him as her personal Savior. During these times, she and I used to talk a lot on the phone, and eventually we became really close and started liking each other. Right now I am very much in love with her and want to marry her. But I want to know whether this is God's will in my life or whether I am acting out of my earthly desire. I want only the will of God to be established in my life.

Can you please give me a piece of advice which would be helpful in making a decision? Answer Thanks for your question. I have only one word of caution: Be wise in assessing whether she is a believer. But because she is such a new believer, and because your question makes it sound as if you may have become emotionally intimate with her and developed strong feelings for her even before she professed Christ, I just want to encourage you to test whether you are being wise and thinking clearly.

I have heard from and talked to a lot of folks over the years who married someone in the context of "missionary dating" or in the context of dating a person who was a very new believer, only to have the person later renounce Christ or be disciplined from the church with devastating consequences for the marriage and the spiritual and emotional wellbeing of the believing spouse.

First, what does your church — and its leadership — have to say? If your church has membership, has she joined? Have you sought counsel from others whom you trust in the church regarding your potential relationship? What are their thoughts? Second, since you have spoken with her and been with her at church extensively both before and after she professed Christ, what have you observed? What is her attitude toward her own sin?

Is she clear on the Gospel? Have her priorities changed? Have you seen fruit in her life over time since she professed Christ? But if you lovingly and soberly seek wisdom for yourself and counsel from other believers who know both of you, you will be much more likely to make a decision that honors God and is for your spiritual good and hers.

What you call your "earthly desire" may very well line up with Scripture. God is a good God who delights to give us good gifts for our good and His glory. God instituted marriage as a good part of the creation order Genesis 2 , and godly marriages bring God glory by modeling the wonderful way that Christ has loved the church and that the church responds to His loving leadership Ephesians 5: I would encourage you to pray about the decision to marry this woman and seek counsel from the elders in your church or other godly people you trust.

Bottom line, Scripture is clear that believers are only to marry other believers see 1 Corinthians 7: Beyond that, marriage is a good gift ordained by God, and it is natural and right that you desire it. I will pray that the Lord gives you wisdom as you think through all this.

Blessings, Copyright Scott Croft. Like what you see?

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CHRISTIAN DATING: GOOD ENOUGH VS. GOD ORDAINED



Dating and god s will

How can I tell the difference between God's will and my desire? Feb 07, Scott Croft Question A few months back, I happened to meet this girl who came to my church. She started coming to church because she has a broken family, and she wanted God to intervene in her life and help her. After a few months of coming to church, she surrendered her life to Christ and accepted Him as her personal Savior.

During these times, she and I used to talk a lot on the phone, and eventually we became really close and started liking each other. Right now I am very much in love with her and want to marry her.

But I want to know whether this is God's will in my life or whether I am acting out of my earthly desire. I want only the will of God to be established in my life. Can you please give me a piece of advice which would be helpful in making a decision?

Answer Thanks for your question. I have only one word of caution: Be wise in assessing whether she is a believer. But because she is such a new believer, and because your question makes it sound as if you may have become emotionally intimate with her and developed strong feelings for her even before she professed Christ, I just want to encourage you to test whether you are being wise and thinking clearly.

I have heard from and talked to a lot of folks over the years who married someone in the context of "missionary dating" or in the context of dating a person who was a very new believer, only to have the person later renounce Christ or be disciplined from the church with devastating consequences for the marriage and the spiritual and emotional wellbeing of the believing spouse. First, what does your church — and its leadership — have to say? If your church has membership, has she joined?

Have you sought counsel from others whom you trust in the church regarding your potential relationship? What are their thoughts? Second, since you have spoken with her and been with her at church extensively both before and after she professed Christ, what have you observed?

What is her attitude toward her own sin? Is she clear on the Gospel? Have her priorities changed? Have you seen fruit in her life over time since she professed Christ? But if you lovingly and soberly seek wisdom for yourself and counsel from other believers who know both of you, you will be much more likely to make a decision that honors God and is for your spiritual good and hers.

What you call your "earthly desire" may very well line up with Scripture. God is a good God who delights to give us good gifts for our good and His glory. God instituted marriage as a good part of the creation order Genesis 2 , and godly marriages bring God glory by modeling the wonderful way that Christ has loved the church and that the church responds to His loving leadership Ephesians 5: I would encourage you to pray about the decision to marry this woman and seek counsel from the elders in your church or other godly people you trust.

Bottom line, Scripture is clear that believers are only to marry other believers see 1 Corinthians 7: Beyond that, marriage is a good gift ordained by God, and it is natural and right that you desire it. I will pray that the Lord gives you wisdom as you think through all this. Blessings, Copyright Scott Croft.

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Dating and god s will

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2 Comments

  1. In the Bible, we are commanded to love our mates whether we feel in love or not; the feelings follow if we obey.

  2. Surely there are some nice girls somewhere in Canaan! No one else is asking me out. Date exclusively in groups.

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