I thought that since I was an attractive, fit, well-educated, financially and emotionally secure guy that I would have no problem finding a woman in her mid 30s to settle down with and start a family. I have tried a combination of online dating, speed dating, professional singles events, volunteering, happy hours etc. I thought that online dating would be great since you are essentially pre-screening people for dates. I am told that women want to settle down and have kids, etc.
At singles events, women come in groups and are reluctant to talk to men. In online situations, women say they want desperately to meet a nice guy like me, but never answer my response to their profile. I am trying to remain positive, but two things are really bothering me. One, that younger women are no longer interested in dating men who are even just slightly years older than them and sometimes want to date men years younger then them.
I find the latter hard to believe, but find this mantra in every profile of every professional woman online. Any advice on how to navigate these new paradigms in the dating world? Adam Dear Adam, You came to the right place.
And to directly address your email, I have to divide my response into two different parts: From , men play around a lot. Once a guy crosses 35, however, he theoretically tends to get more serious. Alas, the women with whom he wants to get serious are This gives men time to court, fall in love, travel together, move in, get engaged, and enjoy a few years of childless marriage before starting a family.
The problem is that many women from are independent professionals just like their male peers. Then she hits Theoretically, this is when she starts to get more serious. This is also when all the problems start. Because year-old men who are ready to settle down still want to have time before becoming dads. Thus, their target market remains women, — who may not be ready to settle down quite yet.
These women still have money to make, places to travel and oats to sow. The year-old women who ARE ready for marriage, unfortunately, are roundly ignored by the men they desire — their year-old peers. Which brings us to you, Adam. Find the people who want you. And around and around we go.
But the bigger takeaway is that ALL of us are very judgmental on age. To a 34 year old woman, 42 sounds OLD. To a year-old man who wants his own biological children, anything above 36 is getting into risky territory.
The lesson to all of you younger readers: