Share on Facebook Speed Metal Dating. Predictions of an outright sausage fest were also rampant on Facebook, and to be honest, I half-expected this to be the inconvenient truth.
Us metalheads tend to be awkward in social situations. Why am I wasting my face muscles on you? It turned out to be my best decision of the night. Not only did I get a female perspective on Speed Metal Dating, but when Marisa and I eventually had our own speed date, we got to exchange stories.
To the beefy tunes of legends like Slayer and High on Fire , ladies stayed put as dudes moved down the line one seat at a time. The room practically exploded with conversation instantly. Turns out they were dragged to Vitus by a friend. And they were pretty! Be still my blackened heart. I traded lighthearted insults with one lovely creature with more facial piercings than Al Jourgensen before moving on to her dreadfully charming British friend.
About 10 dates in I was running low on Trooper Ale, so I absconded to the bar with my next date; a female comic who had been hitting the sauce since noon. Was it sexually charged or racially insensitive? He informed me that he had lightheartedly mentioned how jealous he was that some kids got free breakfast at school growing up. Back in the dating pool I eventually matched up with Marisa, whose eyes told me tales of unimaginable horror before her mouth got the chance: Luckily, my first mini-date was with a guy who was nice, normal, and even funny which definitely caused me to misjudge how the night would go.
We joked, we talked, it was pleasant! Physically attractive, hyper guy, clearly into metal, sat down, promptly told me he had his eye on me the whole night and wanted my number Mid-forties, skateboarder, professional drug dealer.
Had no interest in dating, just wanted to find someone who could recommend a good orthodontist since he was new to the country. Only went to the event as a social experiment. Refreshingly normal guy who just wanted to go to the bar with me to get a drink a break for which I was glad.
At that point, all I wanted to do was get a glass of whiskey and thank god that Bachelor No. Speed Metal Dating was definitely a success for some people including lucky Bachelor No. As you can tell, the male and female experiences of Speed Metal Dating turned out to be drastically different. I went on a few more dates, including one where a girl outright shunned me due to my lack of Metallica worship, before calling it a night. It had been legitimately exhausting striking up over two dozen conversations in a two-hour span, but I stood at the bar feeling more connected to my fellow humans.
New potential couples were deep in conversation, exchanging numbers left and right, and making out furiously under the dim lights of Saint Vitus. Sadly, unluckier individuals did bail halfway through Speed Metal Dating or ended up dead-eyed and romantically destitute at the bar.
Remember in March of the Penguins when select males hiked 62 miles through the hellish cold only to find themselves without a mate? This scene was equally depressing.
So how was Speed Metal Dating? Even Marisa admitted she would go again despite her encounter with the Scottish pet-lover.